Capturing Raw Thoughts on the Page: An Interview with ‘Scrambled’ Filmmaker Leach McKendrick

Quintessential eternal bridesmaid Nellie Robinson (Leah McKendrick) constantly finds herself between weddings, baby showers, and bad dates. When she begins to feel like the clock is ticking and is faced with bleak romantic prospects, Nellie decides to freeze her eggs — setting her on an empowering journey to a brave new world where she ultimately discovers “the one” she’s looking for might be herself. 

Write what you know.

That sage advice in the screenwriting sphere never gets old. For some scribes, it’s taken too literally, and we’re left totally disconnected from their literal life story on the page. But if you know how to find the essence of a big life-changing event from your own lived experience that you know will resonate with audiences – run with it and write what you know.

And that is precisely what screenwriter, director, and actress Leah McKendrick did with her latest film, and her feature directorial debut, Scrambled. Leah inherently weaves her rawest vulnerabilities with comedic beats that are so incredibly grounded and real, that the side-splitting laughter turns into tears. Leah made a film with an awe-inspiring team of female filmmakers both behind and in front of the camera – it may just be safe to say it’s a film by women for women – but hey, to the dudes out there, you should watch it too, and learn a thing or two about the realities of womanhood (and then watch and listen to America Ferrera’s monologue in Barbie).

Leah McKendrick recently spoke with Script about why she had to write this story, the importance of being a multi-hyphenate, what she learned from her collaboration with cinematographer Julia Swain, and more!

This interview has been edited for content and clarity.

Sadie Dean: This is a deeply personal story for you. I am so curious for you as a storyteller when was that “aha” moment that you knew you had to get this story on the page and make this film?

Leah McKendrick: I feel like I was quite resentful of the fact that I even felt the need to freeze my eggs. I was like, ‘The WGA didn't cover it…Why do I have to spend all this money just because I haven't found a partner?’ Just on an existential level, I felt like I'd fundamentally failed as a woman. And the way that I was able to justify in my mind spending all this money was, ‘Well, I'm going to use it as research to write a movie, I'll write a movie about it, and that'll be cool. And then then I'll write it off for taxes and it'll be fine.’ But I don't even know if I when I said that., if I really meant it. I was like, ‘No, it's research. It's research. You're not old. It's just research.’

But when I was actually going through it, and I thought, that was another thing, Sadie, I thought I was gonna like write the whole time, like, ‘Oh, I'll write the whole time because I'll be home.’ No, dude, I was so bloated, was not feeling well. Some people were just going to work like nothing happened. My body struggled through it, I'll be honest, and I didn't feel like doing anything. And I think it was more the emotional toll. I was sad. And you know what it takes to write a script. And on some level, you have to believe, you have to be willing to ascend into the clouds and build castles. That is what we do for a living, right? So, I wasn't in a space to dream for a living, I was quite tethered to Earth through my bloated belly.

And so I was on the couch, and I'm Googling movies that are about fertility. And all of the films that I could find were about couples that weren't able to get pregnant and they're struggling and going to the doctor or they lost their pregnancy. The closest one to what I felt was Obvious Child, of course, that one is about abortion. I love that movie. But that wasn't my experience. Even that one had bit of a love story between her and the dude, right? So, for me, I was just like, ‘There is no dude.’ There's dudes being weird in my DMs, but there's no one caring about me, there's no one holding my hand through this.

So, I started taking notes. And I started just trying to capture the raw thoughts. I remember scribbling down, ‘I don't know if I've ever felt so alone.’ That was obviously a line from the film. But I was just trying to capture the raw thoughts, but I didn't really write - more of a stream of consciousness. And then I returned to my writing career because I had deadlines, and I'd sort of taken a little blip away, and I had to get back to work. But a year later, two of my films died in one day and I just said, ‘OK, I can't keep building everyone else's dreams. What do I have to show for all of that hard work?’ Money, that's it. And money doesn't speak to me as loudly as movies do. [laughs] I came here to make movies. So, then I said, ‘I'm going to take a month. And I'm gonna write that script, come hell or high water. I'm making this movie this summer.’ And that's how we did it.

Sadie: That's incredible. In terms of directing, did you write this knowing you’d be the one to direct?

Leah: Yes, because one of the films that they killed was supposed to be my directorial debut. One was a big franchise I had been writing and the next one was my directorial debut. And I just thought I've just lost everything all in one day. I'm going to give myself that directorial debut back. 

And to be totally honest, and I wonder if your readers can relate to this, but it's quite painful to hand your script off. And it changes. That's just the reality of filmmaking, right? Somebody comes in, they're gonna steer the ship. Yours is just a blueprint. What you make is beautiful and important, and it doesn't exist without you. But I don't always feel there's a deep respect given to the writer the way that we deserve. And I just felt fiercely protective of my own real-life experience. And I didn't feel that I needed somebody to step in and infuse it with their experience. I knew the truth. So, I just felt like, why would I hand that over?

Sadie: Yeah, which is fair. You’re wearing many creative hats on this, what was that process like for you in juggling it all as a writer, director, and actress?

Leah: You know, people ask me that a lot. And I think about when the writers’ strike was happening, and we were trying to figure out what I could do promotion-wise as a director or as an actor. And the WGA said you cannot untangle yourself in these different roles. You are one human. And that spoke to me, and I said, ‘OK, well, then I'm gonna stand with my union. And I'm not going to do anything.’ Because I am one person. And that was the beauty.

I think of wearing all the hats, it's not really different hats. It's one hat with many different feathers, you know, [laughs] it's a big hat, because you are one artist. And the power that you bring to your acting is that you are a writer and a director; the power that you bring to your directing is that you are an actor, and you are the writer; the power that you bring to your writing is that you get to direct this and you are already molding your performance on the page. 

So, in many ways, I think it makes people go, how does that even work? And I just go well, all these different skill sets they all have to do with storytelling. It's just we're all storytellers. People always say, ‘Oh, how do you write a script?’ And I go, you have been writing your whole life. You didn't learn how to write a screenplay as a child, but you might have been taught how to write an essay, how to format a poem, a haiku. These are all just different formats, but we have been writing our entire lives.

Directing is just having a vision and knowing how you want something, and sticking to it, and inspiring everyone to follow the light that you are telling them is up ahead. So, in some ways, I don't think that these skills are so foreign to people. I think that people possess and I think screenwriters, especially, are dreamers, and I believe that screenwriters should at least try their hand at directing their own scripts.

Sadie: What was the collaboration process like with your DP Julia Swain?

Leah: My God, Julia was my everything. My everything. She's truly my right hand. I couldn't have survived it without her. And I'm so glad that I met with so many women cinematographers. I always knew that I needed a woman, that was a non-negotiable. I wasn't even messing around with that. From day one we knew that was gonna happen. But I met with so many incredible women cinematographers - incredible work, just like a truly incredible journey. I just knew it was Julia from the moment that I met her. And she's not warm and fuzzy [laughs] immediately, and I am a hugger and I'm pretty outgoing, what you see is what you get. I just had this feeling and I told Jonathan Levine, my producer, ‘She's not warm and fuzzy.’ He goes, ‘You don't want a warm and fuzzy DP. You want somebody that's got an eye on the prize.’ And that's such a good point. And I couldn't have expected us to work as well together as we did.

The trust was just there. I would have an idea and she would elevate it. She was the one that told me that I had to think about transitions. How are we going to cut this from here to here? And I went, ‘Oh my god, in my inexperience I'd never thought of it,’ I didn't write those in and I never really thought about that. So, she challenged me to think, OK, how are we going to transition? I'm always like, ‘What's weird Julia?’ I don't want it bright like a typical rom-com. I don't want it to look like a commercial. This isn't a commercial, this is a true story of my pain of my feelings of failure. 

I want women to see this and laugh and then go on this journey, that darkens and it feels really heavy at times, and then ultimately come out of it, and reach the other side. And I want that to be reflected in the way that we shoot everything. And everything needs to be deeply, deeply firmly in her POV. So, what does that mean? And she was the one that would translate that into my language.

I started to learn through her what I like and what I don't like. She was like, ‘You like extreme close-ups, you want to be up there with the needle.’ I want to see the blood. I want to see my cellulite. I want to see everything really up close. And I like huge wides because it makes it really lonely and she's so tiny in the frame. Our relationship has taught me how to direct and how to be a director and what it means to collaborate. She's my everything. I could not have done it without her.

Sadie: Being a multi-hyphenate and having just taken on this big project, any big takeaways or any words of wisdom?

Leah: I would encourage, and this is some tough love, I would encourage all writers to stop believing that their script is enough. I really think that if you just think your script is that good, and that you can just send it off, and it'll get made, you spent a lot of your life waiting. You spend a lot of your life waiting for permission. And I would challenge and encourage any writer out there or director out there to become a producer and get your friends and shoot it yourself. And I'm sure you want $8 million. Don't we all? Don't we all want Julia Roberts? Don't we all want to do Dune? Of course. But make a couple on your own, where your voice is really clear. Where they go, ‘Wow, this kid did something kind of epic with very little, I wonder what they could do if we gave her a million bucks, $2 million bucks?’ So, I would say greenlight yourself and stop waiting for permission.

Sadie: What do you hope audiences take away from seeing your movie?

Leah: That you have time. We've got time. Don't let anyone tell you that time is up because time is not up. You forge your own path. Run towards your dreams. Run towards whatever it is that you seek in this life. And don't let anybody tell you that time has run out. 

Scrambled is now playing in Theaters.